26 October 2008

LOG!

We have some construction going on at our workplace. On Friday the crew was cutting down some unwanted trees. As I walked out of work that night I saw some of the trunk pieces laying around near the parking lot. And if this is what you would've started singing in your head as you walked by...

then I think that you're awesome.
Don't worry, I did tromp through the muddy work zone in my nice work shoes and grabbed a log. Whose birthday is next?

He Was Injured. Injured Bad.

Would you please find this kid and drop him on my doorstep. We could have alot of fun together.

While you're at it, I want this guy too.

19 October 2008

Steeped In Fall Fun

I don't do a very good job of utilizing the weekend for recovery from the previous week. But I like it that way. I'd rather be out and doing something than staying at home.

On Friday a few friends from work went with me to the Pumpkin Festival down at Thanksgiving Point. I will recommend it to you. It was a wicked fun time. There were hayrides, a corn maze, a pumpkin princess playland, a balloon animal maker, a tower of pumpkins, a hot black guy that we were all drooling over and a pig wrangler. I was under orders from Kyle to give my number to two different dudes this weekend and I thought of flirting with the pig wrangler but then chickened out. I was intimidated by a pig wrangler! What the...! He was very cute and good with children. And I bet that we all can agree that a man who is good with children is massivly attractive.

Get ready for a slew of pictures.

Jessica, Adrianne, Ashley and I entered by way of the adult maze, which I gather is more elaborate and takes superior navigational skills to maneuver around.

We wandered around the maze for about an hour and started patting each other on the back for a job well done as we approached the exit. We walked through, turned around and saw that we had exited the entrance to the kiddie maze. I do not take responsibility for that. I was voted out as the leader only 10 minutes into the whole endeavor for trailblazing my own path. What they didn't realize is that I'm part bloodhound. This wouldn't have happened under my direction.


Ashley is sporting the incredible balloon hat that was made especially for me. This is an original. The balloon animal maker said that he had visions of making this hat but never made it a reality. And then I came along and inspired him. I was getting some pretty intense stares as I walked around the rest of the festival with this amazing couture piece. I took it apart the next day so as to try my hand at balloon bending. I ended up with 4 popped balloons out of the 5 original balloons. I don't think that I'll be moonlighting at birthday parties anytime soon.

The tower o' pumpkins. It was very impressive. It was even more impressive when we thought they were real. They were plastic. Sorry to ruin in for you too.


After we arrived back home I got call from Camrann and Ben saying that they were going to the Nickelcade. I met them there and spend over an hour on this fantastic Star Wars game. I'm not as good of a Jedi as I thought I was. I had the spend about $2 in nickles to keep myself alive in order to complete all the missions. And sadly, I must admit that I was defeated by Darth Vader. I also did not deposit the missiles into the main reactor and the Death Star was not destroyed. But looking on the bright side, I was not swayed by all my failures to joining up with the dark side.

And if you ever wondered what 700 tickets can get you, wonder no more.

It can get you a pirate flag.
That you can wear as a cape.
And pretend that you're something awesome!

The Biggest Winner!

I have finally chosen a winner. Actually a name was pulled randomly from a magical Red Sox hat. This is what the hat came up with...
YEAH BRENNA!

And because my hair looked really cute today I'm going to throw in a mix of great running music for your new athletic endeavor.

Thanks to everyone for participating! I really enjoyed reading your comments. I'm surprised that not one of you have slept naked on a hammock. What's that all about? It's delightful. I need to spread more awareness of naked hammock sleeping. That's my next goal. Also, some have wondered why I asked about celebrity political influence. I have heard many say that they don't appreciate when celebrities push their political agenda. But I think that if you have a voice and an audience you should use it. Anyway, I mainly asked to see what your creative minds would come up with. It seems that Chuck Norris would make this election a whole lot easier for all of us if he just ran for President.
I've decided that giveaways are super fun (even though I did this initial one as a total mockery of all other giveaways) and will now inform you that I perhaps will do others in the future. So don't stop reading this blog! That would be bad for your health...and your chances at winning.

Please excuse me as I go and watch some more baseball. Game 7 tonight people!

16 October 2008

Watching The Red Sox Is Like Indulging In Crack

Cheering on the Red Sox is going to be the death of me. I've never experienced such fluctuations in my heart rate as I did tonight watching game 5 of the ALCS.

Let me break it down for you:

Red Sox are behind in the series 1-3. Tampa Bay only needs to win this game to get into the World Series. It's tied 7-7 in the bottom of the ninth. Two outs and no one on base. Youkalis hits and gets to second. J.D. Drew comes up to bat and ends up with a full count. I'm going to pee my pants at this point. He hits to centerfield and brings Youk home. My heart goes wild! I want to pee my pants in excitement now, rather than in anxiety.

Now I realize that they're not in the clear yet and that they still needs to win two more games, but nothing is impossible for the Sox. They kept it alive. More baseball tomorrow!

Recipe Time!

I brought some lemon bars to Absolute (just where they belong) tonight and both Cam and Miyo requested the recipe. I will warn you that the caloric content of this is through the damn roof. You perhaps will purge the ones you ate after reading this.

LEMON BARS

2 cups sifted flour
1/2 cup confectioners sugar
1 cup butter
4 beaten eggs
2 cups granulated sugar
1/3 cup lemon juice
1/4 cup flour
1/2 tsp. baking powder

Sift together flour and confectioners sugar. Cut in butter with a pastry blender. Press into a 13x9" baking dish. Bake at 350 degrees for 20 to 23 minutes or until lightly browned. Beat together eggs, sugar and lemon juice. Sift together the flour and baking powder. Stir into egg mixture. Pour over baked crust. Bake at 350 degrees for 25 minutes longer. Cool. Sprinkle with confectioners sugar.

13 October 2008

12 October 2008

VTD's First Giveaway!

It seems that there is something in common with those super popular blogs that everybody reads (Seriously So Blessed, The Pioneer Woman, Word To Your Mother, etc...) and that something is...a fabulous GIVEAWAY! So to rocket myself to blog superstardom I'm going to do the same.

In honor of the first snow of the year, the prize is going to be a pair of these ultra warm, extra comfortable, massively reinforced Snap-On Tools socks. Now you may think that you don't need another pair of socks and therefore not enter this contest, but I'm here to tell you that these socks are unlike any that you've ever owned before. So don't miss out on this rare opportunity.



All that you have to do is answer these simple questions in the comments section:
  1. Have you ever slept naked on a hammock?
  2. If a celebrity were to influence your political decisions, who would it be?
  3. Which post on this blog has led you to greater enlightenment and therefore a grander and more fulfilling life?

The person with the most correct answers will receive this coveted prize. Anonymous comments welcome. I could arrange a drop off at a local Cafe Rio or Arby's or something. But if you are to go that route I must warn you that I am a ninja and your identity will be discovered.

08 October 2008

The Burger King or Garth?

Jenny posted a fantastic Halloween piece which featured some excellent homemade costumes from yesteryear. I enjoyed it more than I can express.

Well, with Halloween approaching, I need to start putting together a costume and I need your help in deciding.


A few years ago I wanted to be The Burger King but couldn't find a costume to make that idea a reality. The idea was resurrected in my mind and I went online to find a King mask. I found a whole pile of The Burger King costumes on various sites. What do you think? He's so creepy that he's incredibly hilarious? Yep, that's what I thought too.But my dilemma is that I wanted to be Garth Algar this year because I have the perfect haircut for it. And I love him. Love him. Also, a pal at work said that he would dress up as Wayne if I wanted to be Garth. He has longish dark hair and would be perfect as Wayne. Are you as conflicted as I am?

Can I tell you one thing that I won't be this Halloween?Don't even ask. I just won't do it.

In my searching I found the funniest couples costume of all time. Highly inappropriate but you can't deny the comedy in such a display.

(picture removed due to friend request)

It was just too funny not to post. (Brenna, don't blush. You're the one that told me about that French commercial where the young boy was given consent for every bad thing that he did. I swear that I messed up our testing because I was laughing soooo hard and for soooo long!)

Back to the matter at hand...who should I be for Halloween '08? The King or Garth? The pilgrim still isn't an option.

Garth it is! Thanks for the input. Anyone have a flannel shirt I could borrow?

I might have influenced someone else at work to be The King. I can't wait to see if she really does it.

01 October 2008

Jessi Farted

Fakeout! She didn't toot.
Here's the picture of us lovely ladies from tonights dinner. Posting it saves me the time of actually sending it to all of you.
Ok ladies, let's not wait until another birthday to get together. I'm proposing an Oktoberfest, excluding the flowing beer. Maybe we could combine it with Beau's brilliant Turkey in October idea? Maybe carve a pumpkin or two? Watch High School Musical? No, wait...not that.
How about the 17th or 18th?

30 September 2008

Mark Farted

I guess Ashley wasn't postitioned quite as optimally as Stefan and I were.Man, I love my brothers.

This was taken about 4 years ago and we still uncontrollably laugh whenever we see it. Classic.

28 September 2008

Throwdown Showdown II: The Return

Both Camrann and Steve didn't win their respective fights and it was really hard for me to see that. But really good at the same time. First let me tell you about their fights and then I'll tell you my thoughts on it.

Cam fought before Steve did. He was up against Steven Siler for the featherweight title. Steven is said the be the top Featherweight in the state. Cam was a really good match for him. The pace was furious from the start. They both just unloaded some good combinations on each other. It happened so fast that I can't remember all the details of it. I think Steven got the takedown, ended up in Cam's guard and while Cam was trying to lock him down Steve got some really good throws in. The fight ended within two minutes with Steve taking the win by rear naked choke.

Steve "Razor" Sharp fought Rad Martinez for the Lightweight title. This fight went for five five minute rounds. Talk out brutal! You've got to be beyond human to go that long fighting. The fight took a definite pattern that started with a few seconds of good standup, then Rad shooting in for the single leg takedown up against the cage, Rad ending up in Steve's guard and then Steve locking him down. Steve, in my opinion, is a WAY better fighter than Rad is. Rad is a very accomplished wrestler, but the only thing he could do was take Steve down and muscle his way around. Steve was excruciatingly close to getting an submission by armbar a few times, but Rad defended well against it. Rad won by unanimous decision.

As soon as I saw Cam tap out my heart was literally hurting. The loss sucked some of the life right out of me. It was a surprise to me to feel that way. My body felt achy and I wanted to cry. I kept asking myself why I was taking it so hard. I couldn't figure it out. It just hurt really bad. I felt quite a bit better when Cam was interviewed a few minutes later and he had this huge smile on his face while told us how fun these events are and how he enjoys fighting. I felt hopeful again and when Steve got in the cage I was banking on his win to erase the disappointment that I felt after Cam's fight. When he didn't win I was crushed. The achy feeling came back and little tears starting forming in the bottom of my ocular cavity again. But then I saw Steve run and slide across the cage aided by the sweat that him and Rad left on the mat during their fight. When Steve was interviewed he was not upset at all. He took the defeat like a rock star. My heart recovered once again after seeing that.

On the drive home I started really thinking about why I was so affected by the losses and came to the conclusion that I only identify those guys with fighting. That's what our relationship is based on. Plus, I had never seen them lose before. They were invincible to me. I had unrealistic expectations of them. As I started thinking about them as people first and fighters second, all those feelings of disappointment totally left. All weekend I started thinking about other people and what I identify them with and how it has affected me and my outlook of them. Can you believe that the fights have helped me realize this? Awesome.
Here's a picture of some of us at the show. I guess only the girls and Cam are allowed to smile. I love our team.
Throwdown ETC puts on a pretty great show. The energy is high and the match-ups are good.

The night started out with Johnny "The Mechanic" Miller against Travis "Hatred" Robison, two Bantamweights. The fight was interesting and had a good pace. Johnny looked close to getting a submission a couple of times. The fight got a little screwy when Johnny had Travis in a triangle choke and the ref had them disengage and restart in that position in the middle of the ring. What us spectators could gather from that is that the ref thought he heard the bell and stopped the fight and when he realized his mistake he put them back as they were to resume the fight. When the ref was putting them back down on the ground it looked as if Johnny wanted to stand up and start even though he had an advantageous position. But the ref put them on the ground where Johnny could get an even better lockdown on the triangle and Travis tapped within a few seconds after the restart of the fight. Actually, I don't remember if the submission was by triangle or armbar. While the triangle was on you could see Johnny have a good hold on an extended arm and his hips came up high. Anyway, both corners looked pissed about the situation.

Craig "The Boss" Ross vs. Eddie Pelczynski was the next fight. Eddie won by TKO in the first round. All but two of the fights ended in the first round. The other two were decsions. Eddie came out from California to take this fight.

The next fight between Simon "Sticks" Ioane and Jacob "The Triangle" South was kind of crazy. Simon knocked Jacob down with a few good strikes within a few seconds of the start. Simon followed him to the ground and landed alot of shots to the head and body while Jacob was facedown on the mat. The ref got in to stop the fight and ended up dislocating Simon's shoulder while pushing him off. The fight only lasted 9 seconds.

Ben Fuimaono fought Jordan Smith for the Light-Heavyweight title. Ben should have had this fight but he lost. It was a submission but I can't remember which one it was.

Dayne "Daynegerous" Aristizabal was up against a guy named Pooky "First Blood" Hoots. The fight lasted less than 30 seconds and went to Dayne by rear naked choke. He must have slapped that choke on good because Pooky (I'd change my name if that were me) tapped fast.

I really liked the next fight between DeMarques "Darkness" Johnson and Brandon "The Animal" Olsen. I haven't seen DeMarques lose yet and he has fought in most of the shows that I've attended. I think this fight actually went two rounds. I like watching DeMarques use his long legs to attack. He's got some good ground game. He defended against a guillotine choke a few times. He was really working to get the submission. It finally came by way of a triangle choke.

The fight between Chilo Gonzalez and Court "The Crusher" McGee lasted all three rounds. It was a tad bit boring. Court was in Chilo's guard quite a bit and stayed really close to his chest most of the time. He'd throw a few punches and then huddle down to avoid any strikes from Chilo. Chilo even had his guard open frequently and he could have passed it. But I'm sure it's hard to remember that stuff when your being punched in the face and liver.

Dan "DJ" Gardner and David "Pretty Dangerous" Allred fought between Cam and Steve's fights, so I don't remember too much of it because I was wrapped up in disappointment and anticipation at that time. I do remember that Dan Gardner knocked his opponent out in the last Throwdown show and it was a huge display of power. He also apparently has quite a following as the McKay Events Center erupted when he came out. He ended up losing in the first round by rear naked choke.

So there is a recap of the fights. I can write what I thought but honestly, I have no idea what a real fight is like and can pretty much bet on the fact that it is nothing like the training that I do. So I take my hat off to all those that have nads big enough to enter that cage. Bravo! And once again I want to tell Cam and Steve how much I adore them as friends AND as fighters!

25 September 2008

Hey Camrann!

Hurry up and win your fight so we can start having lunch together again!

That's all.

23 September 2008

Inappropriate Laughter or Inappropriate Shirt?

I was sitting in a meeting today and looked over across the room to see this...
And then the uncontrolled laughter began. And confused stares in my direction came after that, which was followed by the suppression of the need to explain myself.

21 September 2008

VTG (Vanessa the Golfer)

Yesterday Stefan and I entered a golf tournament. The company I work for sponsored the event. The course was up at The Homestead in Midway. I know what you're asking yourself...Vanessa golfs? Hell yeah I do. Fakeout. I don't at all. I played once on my mission and once last year down in St. George with two old men that separated me from my group and made me sit on their lap in the golf cart. But that's a story for another day.

We played a 4 man scramble, where each person takes a swing and then we play from where the best ball lands. You have to use each persons drive off the tee at least three times. I was feeling the pressure. Stefan and I were paired up with two of Nelson's clients. They were super nice and encouraging. And I didn't do that bad for as little as I've played. The team actually used 6 of my drives. Yes, SIX! I was a very good driver and worked pretty well with the 3 wood and the pitching wedge. But I was crap when any kind of iron was put into my hands. And I was totally ROBBED on the longest drive competition. I hit an incredible shot down the fairway and would've beaten the woman with the longest drive by at least 200 feet but my ball rolled ONE FOOT off of the fairway! I was a bit frustrated with that. I would have loved to have won that competition.

Stefan on the other hand carried our team. I was SO PROUD of him. One of the guys we were with worked in a pro shop for 12 years and was asking Stef for advice on every hole. We pretty much used his ball most of the time.

I will say that I don't think that I would do 18 holes again anytime soon. I was getting a bit fidgety when we hit 5 hours of continuous play. The ground was wet when we started and my adorable canvas shoes with little hearts on them were soaking the entire rest of the game. I had to pee so bad by the second to last hole that I was even setting up any shots, I was just whacking it in the general vicinity of the hole in order to speed up the game. It also started raining on us sporadically and I'm pretty sure that by the end of the game I looked and smelled like a drowned cat, and that's when the company wanted a group shot of our team. We also observed a bit of lightning as we stood in a wide open space with a metal rod in our hands.

Here's some shots of Stefan the future pro and Vanessa the perpetual amateur:



I was digging in the golf bag that Stef provided for me and was DELIGHTED when I fished out an Underdog golf ball. It was just one of those stupid little things that for some reason I took great joy in. I referred to my ball as Underdog for the rest of the day.
After a long drive - Hey Stef, did you see where Underdog landed?
After hitting it in the lake - Hey Stef, would you please go in there and find Underdog for me? (And he did!)
After Stef accidentally picked up my ball and played with it - STEF! Did you just take a hit on Underdog!? Sheesh! What kind of brother are you?!
But tragedy occurred at the second to last hole (when I had to pee super badly and was recklessly swinging away). I lost Underdog in some tall grass. The game was over for me at that point.
The best part of the whole event was riding in the cart and leaning out to scoop up the golf balls while Stefan was driving at top speed. And then having him yell at me when I inevitably would miss it. It was awesome. Oh and the second best part of the day was winning a BLUE COOLER with WHEELS and a LONG HANDLE at the drawing during the luncheon. Anyone want to buy it off me? It's pretty classy!

15 September 2008

To All Protectors of Justice and Freedom!

You know how in all the superhero TV shows and movies they don't reveal their identity to those they love and care about for fear of jeopardizing their lives? I just want you to know that if you do have an alter ego, you can tell me. I'm tough enough to handle your nemesis. I know that there can be loneliness is keeping such secrets. But I will be there for you. You can trust me.

10 September 2008

It's Fight Time Again

The Throwdown ETC is putting on another fight night that takes place at the McKay Events Center on Friday, September 26th at 6:00. Check out the AWESOME fight card here. Contact me if you want to go. I can get tickets at Absolute, which would benefit the fighters that we have in the show.

My pal Camrann, is fighting for the Featherweight title against Steve Siler. I would compare this fight to an Ewok fighting a AT-ST (all terrain scout transport) in the Battle of Endor. The man is mostly machine. I love his picture on the poster above. He's directly to the left of the man in the bottom center. Don't mess.

I made my first real bet the other day. One of the guys I work with used to wrestle and knows Steve "Razor" Sharp's opponent, Rad Martinez, fairly well. They are fighting each other for the Lightweight title. The guy at work was talking real big about how Steve was going to get destroyed. I'm so confident that Steve will take the win that I put $50 down on it! He doesn't know Steve like I do. Sucker.

Ben Fu and Pat Baker are also guys I know that are in the show. I haven't seen them train at Absolute in a while though. I don't know if I would feel confident stepping in the ring without training furiously beforehand. Just saying.

Johnny Miller, Ben's younger bro is once again in this show. He was on the card last time but circumstances were such that he didn't fight. Check out the link I posted to the fight card. The lighting in the pic makes him look like he's got a severe case of jaundice. I'm not calling him yellow though. He may only be 135 lbs, but could probably hand my can to me if it ever came to that.

So if you're looking for something to do next Friday night, look no further. You should come to the fights.

09 September 2008

And On To Victory

I'd like to announce that I'm going to be in my very first grappling tournament on November 15th down in Orem. If you are at all interested in seeing what I've been learning the past 9 or 10 months, you are welcome to attend and watch me grapple (no striking involved). It's on a Saturday morning at 11:00am. You can find more info out here. What's really cool about this tournament is that it's a submission only competition. There's no time limit and no points. You win only by submitting your opponent. I can't hardly wait. There is nothing like getting a submission. And there's nothing like coming so close to being submitted and then somehow doing something right to get out of it.

Training is going so well right now. Last month I was showing up a ton and really trying to buckle down and improve my game, but I felt like I was regressing. It was really frustrating me. But then September hit and everything has really been coming together.


I was rolling with Pedro a couple weeks ago and I would tell him how to submit me and he would do it. Eveytime! I knew exactly what was coming and was trying my hardest to defend against it and I couldn't! It was the coolest thing ever. Rear naked choke, triangle, teepee, twister, electric chair, choke from knee-on-belly position, arm bar from the mount, arm bar after pulling guard, kimura...anything! We did this for quite a while. It made me want to work so hard so that someday I can be a black belt too. There isn't a better sport than jujitsu!


This is Ben G, one of my favorite grappling partners. I absolutely love working with this dude. He's super strong and technical. He makes things really tough on me. I learn so much through my failures. I'm lasting so much longer against these colored belts now.

This is Camrann working on some neck strengthening exercises. This guy doesn't quit. He does what he should do to be a great fighter and then he does more.
Here's some shots of a Muay Thai class last week.





Looks like fun, no? Come to a class.

02 September 2008

Reject

I did it. I put my heart out on the line. What I meant to say to him was, "I'm interested in you and want to know if you feel the same way because you act like you really care about me and it makes me confused." And it came out as, "I don't really want to be friends with you anymore because I know that you will ultimately reject me and I'll hate that you will still flirt with me making the pain of the rejection last forever." And the reaction I wanted was, "Alex, I adore you and will validate your feelings on this matter with sensitivity and an open mind." Instead I got, "Alex, you're being weird so let's just go home and sleep on it and see if you change your mind tomorrow." And after the conversation I was hoping that I would feel better about the situation because I communicated brilliantly and instead I walked away feeling, you know...retarded. I really need to hire someone to stand by my side and punch me in the face whenever I'm about to do anything really stupid. I might have more success in life that way.

But then I went to Absolute where all the guys in there make me feel like an intelligent and sassy supermodel. I'm not joking about that.