27 November 2008

Fine, He Dazzles Me Too

I know, I know. I'm the one female who wasn't waiting on baited breath for Edward to make his on-screen appearance, yet I've seen the movie TWICE already and it hasn't even been out a week! I'm embarrassed. I went to an anti-Twilight party on Friday night at my friend Thor's house. He invited me up with a couple other co-workers to watch a real vampire movie, The Lost Boys. Have you seen that flick recently? Please do. Go to your online rental site and put it in your queue right now. Seriously. I'll wait. Done? Ok. It's nothing like you remember. I reminisce back to when I was 11 or 12 and had to sneak to a friend's house to watch it because my parents wouldn't let me see rated R stuff. Why was I such a rotten kid? I hope I never have a child like myself. But I digress. I recall being scared to death and absolutely SWOONING over Corey Feldman and Corey Haim. Now I find it to be highly comical. The music, the outfits, the dialogue...everything is hilarious! I can't wait to discuss it with you after it arrives in your mailbox.

Anyway, I saw Twilight on Saturday night with my PIC. We went to the 10:45pm showing and I almost fell asleep numerous times. Not only was it getting way past my normal bedtime, but I was so bored with the pace of the movie. Edward looked like he was constantly constipated and in total agony. Every word that him and Bella spoke was so deliberate and filled with angst, it was so hard not to yell and the screen and implore them to just spit it out! Argh! And what is with way he sparkled? Honestly, he looked like one of those fuzzy My Little Ponies that have that bit of iridescent shimmer. It was tragic. I will give credit where credit is due though..........Edward was smoking HOT. His angular features were making me all tingly. The baseball scene was awesome - the music was good and the power that they possessed as they were swinging the bat was extremely sexy. James, a real vampire, was awesomely bad. Also, when Edward took Bella to his house for the first time and then carried her on his back through the forest, she had over/under hooks with her hands and heel hooks in his thighs.....(are you wondering the relevance of this bit of information?)......which is the best way to stay on someone's back when you're doing jujitsu! If he changed his mind and wanted to take her away to drink her blood in private, then she would have been in the most optimal position to choke him out, rendering him unconscious and giving her time to go and whittle a wooden stake out of a tree branch and stab it through his perfectly chiseled chest. But as it turns out, Edward is a model of self-control and discipline that no other man could ever match, which is why all of our "necks belong to Edward".

We weren't having a young women's activity this week because it was the day before Thanksgiving. I was talking to a few of the girls after church and they asked me if I wanted to hang out Wednesday night in place of the activity. I want you to know that none of the girls actually consider me their leader, I'm just their 30 year old friend. I was trying to get them to think that going to one of their houses to play Guitar Hero was a good idea. They were dead set on going to see Twilight and I am so glad that they were so persistent - I HAD THE BEST TIME EVER! The best way to see this movie is with giggly, twitterpated, young girls. Actually, it's seeing it with Lucy (15), Madeline (15), Tessa (13), and little Hannah (11). Everytime Edward made an appearance Lucy would start breathing very rapidly, practically hyperventilating. Tessa was pointing out cool observations that she made, such as whenever Victoria (in James' coven) made a kill she would wear that person's clothes and that there is a naked barbie doll in Bella's room. They giggled and clapped through the whole movie. I was loving every second.

Team Edward!

5 comments:

Mindi said...

i think that's the reason i enjoyed twilight so thoroughly---seeing it with a 13 year old who squeals every time edward makes a "moody" face (wait. that's the ENTIRE movie) is the only way to go.

but i'm easily entertained, so there you have it.

rachel said...

The LOST boys is one of my personal faves. We used to watch it in high school school and rewind scenes over and over. Now THAT is a vampire movie...

Anonymous said...

Lori Iannucci and I went to see it, with her two girls and a packed house of hormonal teenager girls. The ONLY way to see it! I've never laughed so hard in my life, as Lori would scream out, 'i love you edward!' and her girls would hiss at us to 'stop making fun of the movie, and get out!' Seriously, it was like trying not to laugh out loud in Sacrament meeting, and we keep covering out mouths and shaking with laughter, as Lori, ohh'ed and ahh'ed over Edward and would set off the audience with swoons'. Oh and I told her that she must yell out 'TEAM EDWARD!!" at the end of the film. Too Funny!!

Anonymous said...

Anonymous, is Me--Aunt Marilee. I don't know how to do this stuff. Didn't you think 'vampire James', looked like Nathaniel? And the fun part was that the movie really wasn't that bad, even though the first hour felt like 5 hours long.

Rachel said...

Vanessa, you just made me laugh so hard at your description of how Bella on Edward's back was in the optimal jujitsu chokehold! Awesome insight, hahaha! (this is Rachel (F) S.